


Tender Mercies

by terma_archivist



Category: Once a Thief (TV)
Genre: Episode: s01e01 Pilot (Once a Thief), Episode: s01e03 Trial Marriage, Episode: s01e04 Art of Death, Episode: s01e05 Mac Daddy, Episode: s01e12 The Last Temptation of Vic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-01-01
Updated: 2002-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:33:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26535157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/terma_archivist/pseuds/terma_archivist
Summary: Note from alicettlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived atTER/MAand was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2019. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address onthe TER/MA collection profile.Spoilers: Pilot, Trial Marriage, Art of Death, Mac Daddy, Last Temptation of Vic—maybe more Disclaimer: Characters owned by Alliance or somebody. Borrowed for fun not profit. Beta Notes: Thanks to mab and Viridian5 for helping me wrestle those commas & pronouns into submission. Thanks to Nicole for helping me see the Boys and saying I did OK when I was really unsure. Some later changes were made so mistakes are all mine. RSM Notes: Thanks to Diana for confidence-boosting early feedback. Sekrit message to Penny: They finally talked! How're Bodie and Doyle doing?
Relationships: Victor Mansfield/Mac Ramsey
Collections: TER/MA





	Tender Mercies

**Author's Note:**

> Note from alicettlg, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [TER/MA](https://fanlore.org/wiki/TER/MA) and was moved to the AO3 as part of the Open Doors project in 2019. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are the creator and would like to claim this work, please contact me using the e-mail address on [the TER/MA collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/terma/profile).  
> Spoilers: Pilot, Trial Marriage, Art of Death, Mac Daddy, Last Temptation of Vic—maybe more Disclaimer: Characters owned by Alliance or somebody. Borrowed for fun not profit. Beta Notes: Thanks to mab and Viridian5 for helping me wrestle those commas & pronouns into submission. Thanks to Nicole for helping me see the Boys and saying I did OK when I was really unsure. Some later changes were made so mistakes are all mine. RSM Notes: Thanks to Diana for confidence-boosting early feedback. Sekrit message to Penny: They finally talked! How're Bodie and Doyle doing?

  
**Tender Mercies  
by Amy B**

  
In frozen horror, Victor watched the bullets rip into his partner, cutting him down in mid-step. Time came to a standstill, and blood sprayed in a slow-motion geyser, covering everything in reach. He leapt to Mac's side and tried to stop the bleeding, but the blood flowed so freely that he couldn't tell where the wounds were. He forgot all his training and awareness of their surroundings as his vision was filled with the crimson flow of his friend's life force leaving his body. Pulling Mac into his arms, Vic cradled him desperately against his chest. The blood soaked through his clothes, bathing him in rapidly cooling warmth. He rocked his partner's lifeless body and begged, brokenly, "Please, Mac, don't leave me. Li Ann's on her way. We'll get you to a hospital. I'm so sorry. Hang on, buddy. I got you, Mac. Just don't leave me." 

But he did. Although Victor clutched frantically at the body slipping away into darkness, Mac left him alone. All alone. 

"No! Mac!" The hoarse shout pulled Victor from sleep. He lay there panting and sweating for nearly a minute before realizing the voice was his own. The dream fused with memories until he couldn't tell where one stopped and the other started. Gunshots, blood, screams... he had heard and seen too much of each over the years, first as a cop then as a secret government agent. Sniffling and brushing the tears from his cheeks, he lay staring into the darkness for several minutes before turning over to look at the clock. It was 2 a.m., just the same as last night and the night before that. 

He needed the rest, but he was afraid to sleep, because he knew the dream would return. He had spent the last week playing hide and seek with sleep, and the Director was starting to notice and comment. He didn't want to imagine what she would do if she decided he needed "help." He certainly wasn't up to her tender mercies right now. 

Victor Mansfield— former cop, secret agent, and all-around tough guy— turned his head into his pillow and cried like a baby. The deep gulping sobs tore at his throat, and the tears made his face burn as bitter as the pain, guilt, and frustration that weighed on his heart. After just a moment, he quieted and reached for a tissue from the nightstand. He blew his nose and wiped his face, while muttering every curse word he had ever heard, plus a few he invented just for this occasion. He hated to cry and had only done so a handful of times since early childhood. It didn't make him feel any better. In fact, it usually made him feel worse. 

He got out of bed and went to the bathroom, leaving the light off. He knew he looked like hell and didn't need the confirmation of looking at himself in the mirror. 

When he was finished, he went to the living room. He slumped onto the couch and wondered what to do now that sleep was out of the question. He picked up the remote and turned on the radio. Dinah Washington was crooning, "If you don't have someone to love you, then you really don't have any thing. So I'll take your arms for my palace, and the sky for my room with a view..." 

He clicked it off and sighed. Lack of a lover was just another of his failures. Li Ann had dumped him, and Mac had never shown interest or even liked him, really. He had never held Mac in his arms except during fights and on the job— and in his dreams, of course. In dreams, Victor had both cradled his lifeless corpse and worshipped his warm, willing body. They had made love in more ways than Vic could count. More positions, more locations, more everything. And Mac had held him in strong wiry arms, and generously loved him with long graceful hands. 

Victor had been dreaming of Mac, off and on, since the first day they had met and fought in Li Ann's apartment. The tenor of the dreams had changed slowly after Li Ann had broken off their engagement. It had been in dreams that he had realized that the marriage would never have worked. He was still very fond of Li Ann, but he had never loved her the way she deserved to be loved by the man she would marry. He hadn't loved her with the soul-deep longing that he felt for Mac. 

Having such deep feelings for a man didn't come as such a surprise for Vic, since he had been attracted to men before. Having deep feelings for Mac Ramsey, on the other hand, had been quite a shock. They were so different that it seemed they had nothing in common. Looking at superficial things like music, clothes, and cars, they still didn't. But the important things like loyalty, honor, and friendship were traits they shared. Mac may have seemed self-centered and immature at times, but he would go to the wall for his partners. 

The thing that had first caught Victor's attention was the thing that still kept him on his toes and slightly uncomfortable— Mac's magnetic sexuality. The man could walk into a room and have women (and men on occasion) falling at his feet with just a glance. Those deep brown eyes would focus with laser-like intensity, making the recipient of the look feel like the center of the universe. 

One quirk of full, soft lips, so sexy they ought to be illegal, made Vic want to drag him into the nearest closet and see just how talented that mouth was. And a full grin could get Vic so hard so fast that he had taken to wearing his shirts untucked to avoid embarrassment. Victor could spend hours staring at Mac's mouth and imagining his kisses. Would he be aggressive, taking swift control? Or would he be tender, following his lover's lead? Vic couldn't imagine Mac being truly submissive, but he sure would have liked to find out. 

Victor shifted on the sofa as his body reacted to his randy thoughts. He briefly considered jerking off, then trying to get some sleep. But he was still upset from the dream and his own blood-soaked memories. All the fantasizing in the world couldn't loosen the grip of depression that threatened to squeeze the life out of him. He felt clammy with sleep sweat and concluded that a shower, just cool enough to take the edge off his arousal, was what he needed. 

Standing under the cascading water failed to soothe him, so Victor decided he had to get out of the apartment. Maybe going for a drive would settle him. He assured himself that this was a perfectly normal thing to do in the middle of the night. He would just go for a nice rambling drive with no set destination, especially not the one place that seemed to be calling to him. 

Ten minutes later, he was slipping on his leather jacket and tucking a gun into the back of his waistband. He usually preferred the shoulder holster he used while working but didn't want to fool with it tonight. He was on his own time, but leaving home completely without protection would be stupid. Going unarmed went against his nature. 

The neighborhood was quiet as he started up his truck and pulled out into the street. There was little traffic; most folks seemed to be at home in bed, where he should be. Where he would be, if not for the troubling feelings rattling around inside him. The emptiness that he sometimes feared was starting to look pretty good compared to the pain of the nightmares. 

If asked later, he would have sworn he had no intention of going where he did. He had driven on autopilot, and instinct had brought him here, to an upscale apartment building in a very nice neighborhood. 

He walked up to the door in the same unthinking, impulsive manner. He stood there for a moment before knocking, wondering what he thought he'd accomplish by coming here. Raising a hand to knock, he figured he was about to find out. 

He knocked, waited a few minutes, and knocked again, his heart in his throat. He stood, outwardly calm, as the door cracked open just far enough for a sleepy eye to peer out at him. 

"Do you know what time it is, Vic? What are you doing here?" asked Mac with a loud yawn. 

"I'm sorry I woke you. I needed to see you," Victor said quietly and a bit uncertainly, ducking his head in embarrassment. 

Mac seemed about to make a customary wisecrack, but he stopped, blinked, and opened the door further. He lowered the weapon he had been holding just out of sight and stepped back for Victor to enter. 

The sight of the stark white bandage wrapped around that bony left shoulder made Victor's chest ache. Rationally and intellectually, he knew it was a minor injury as far as gunshot wounds went. But, emotionally, he couldn't help thinking how close the bullet had come to hitting the heart, neck, or a lung. Mac's life could have been over in a flash, just like in the nightmares that had haunted Vic's sleep for the last seven days. 

Victor followed as his partner turned and headed for the sofa. They each took a seat at opposite ends, and he could feel Mac's eyes on him. Now that he was here, he had no idea what to say. He wasn't even sure what he wanted to say. What could he say without ending their pseudo-friendship and seriously damaging their working relationship? 

"How're you doing? How's the shoulder?" he asked when the silence became oppressive. 

"Thanks to the painkillers, I was fine until you woke me up out of a sound sleep." Despite the contentious words, Mac spoke without the animosity he usually displayed in front of an audience. "What's going on here, Vic? It's the middle of the night." 

"I couldn't sleep. I... I've been having nightmares about the shooting." He shrugged uncomfortably and stared down at his hands as he continued slowly, "I just, you know, wanted to make sure you were okay. And tell you how sorry I am that I let this happen to you." 

"Wait a minute, Vic. You didn't _let_ anything happen." Mac looked like he would have continued, but Victor cut him off. 

"This was all my fault, Mac. I should have known the cartel would have snipers at the warehouse. I should have checked the perimeter more closely and not relied so much on old intelligence. I should have been quicker around that corner. I could have-" 

Now it was Mac's turn to interrupt. "Whoa, take a deep breath and calm down, okay, Mr. Responsibility? We were all working from the same information. And we could have been more careful, yes, but that wasn't your fault. Although if Dobrinsky is going to punish anyone, I'll gladly say you deserve it," he added with a smirk. 

"But it is, Mac. I let myself be distracted, and I didn't protect you when I should have." Victor's voice shook minutely with the anguish he was trying so hard to control. He knew that this night would change their relationship forever, but he didn't hold much hope that the change would be what he wished. 

"I don't need you to protect me," replied Mac slowly as if he had noticed Victor's somewhat fragile state. He looked confused at the ex-cop's uncharacteristic acceptance of blame for a mission that didn't go well. He also seemed interested and definitely not sleepy anymore. "What do you mean, you were distracted?" 

Panic froze Victor in his seat for a moment. "Oh, nothing, um...important. I mean, I wasn't really _distracted_ exactly..." His voice trailed off as he tried to think of something plausible. 

"Come on, Vic. You said distracted, so you meant distracted. I hope you weren't planning ways to win back Li Ann, because that is such a lost cause." Mac continued with a well-practiced barb, "She doesn't want you. I told you she'd never marry you. You have to accept the loss and move on. Find yourself a bird with a broken wing or something." 

"It's not about Li Ann," insisted Victor. 

"Sure it is. You're always mooning over her like a sap who doesn't know when to quit. I expect you to start following her around like that pathetic guy with Lola the courier." 

"I do not 'moon' over Li Ann. You are such a—" Victor bit back the automatic insult, then jumped to his feet and started pacing. He had circled the room twice before he stopped in front of Mac and said swiftly, "I was distracted by _you_ during the whole mission. It's been happening a lot lately. I think about you _all_ the time." 

Mac's eyes widened, and his mouth dropped open. He just stared at Victor for a moment, then began to stammer, "You mean... but I thought... Vic! What, what are you saying here? You're attracted to me?" 

Victor ducked his head but held eye contact and said, "Yes. More than that." 

"More? You're lying!" squeaked Mac. He cleared his throat and said calmly, "How much more?" 

"I think... No, I _know_ that I am in love with you," Victor stated with quiet dignity and walked toward the door. He turned back and said, "If you don't want to work with me anymore, I'll understand. Maybe the Director can make other arrangements for the team. She can pair me with Jackie, and you can get back together with Li Ann." 

Mac stood as quickly as his injury allowed and moved over next to Victor. He put one hand on Victor's arm and said, "Now wait a minute. You act like you already know how I feel when I haven't said a word. I don't want to split up the team, and I don't want Li Ann back, not like you mean anyway. Good grief, posing as the Kinsbruners made it obvious to everyone that we are not meant to be together. Remember that case?" 

"I remember. That's when Li Ann broke up with me. It was, ultimately, for the best. She and I never would have made it." He shook his head, sniffed and looked away. He glanced back at Mac and said, "I know it comes as a shock to hear me say it, but I'm glad you're willing to still work with me. I'll work on this...these feelings and try not to let it interfere with the job again. I would never want to do anything to endanger you or hurt you in any way." He quickly stepped away and turned again for the door, intent on getting away. 

"Vic, don't go yet. I'm just surprised is all, okay? I mean, you act like you can't stand to be in the same room with me most of the time. This is all coming out of the blue. I need some time to process, and we need to talk about it." He flashed that crooked grin that made Vic's stomach flutter, and said, "Don't you think so? Please, stay." 

Victor nodded slowly and smiled as Mac took his arm and led him back to the sofa. Mac pulled Vic down to sit next to him, their thighs and shoulders almost touching. He propped his bare feet up on the coffee table, crossed his hands over his belly, and said, "So, when did it happen for you?" 

Victor was staring at those elegant hands lying on naked skin so close to the pajama bottoms of dark blue silky-looking cotton, which draped Mac's genitals so enticingly, that he almost missed the phrasing of the question. He blinked and looked into Mac's eyes and said, "For me? What do you mean?" 

"When did you—" he fluttered his fingers in the air—"feel the spark?" 

"Oh, I thought you meant that you..." Vic cleared his throat, then rubbed his eyes and said, "I'm not sure. Physically, it was... Well, I always thought you were attractive even when I wanted to smash your face in for turning up alive and trying to take Li Ann from me." 

"Well, you did give it a pretty good try that day in her apartment. But then, so did I." Mac smirked, reminding Vic of the fight. They had both thought they were fending off an intruder until Mac had seen the picture of Vic with Li Ann. Then it had become personal. 

"Yeah, well then it was objective, like looking at a model or a movie star or something—I cannot believe that I'm feeding your overblown ego like this, but it's true. It was after Li Ann broke off our engagement that my attraction became more... just more." He shrugged, uncomfortable talking about this even though he was the one who had brought it up. 

"For me, it was when you admitted you were wrong about McCoy." 

"For you, what? You mean...?" Victor's heart leapt in his chest as he considered what Mac meant. 

Mac continued as if Vic hadn't spoken, "You apologized, but you were so cool about it that I didn't have the heart to say, 'I told you so.' It was almost kind of... um, cute." 

"Cute?" Vic felt vaguely insulted but also intrigued, because he had never heard Mac speak like this before. 

"Yeah," laughed Mac. He turned serious then and said, "And then, when my... my dad showed up, you were so supportive and compassionate that I couldn't help but love you for it." He leaned close and placed a soft kiss to Vic's stubbled cheek. 

"You mean like a friend or a— a partner, right?" Victor couldn't believe his luck if Mac really returned his feelings. He thought the other man must be just playing with him, as usual. 

"Not a friend," whispered Mac as he pressed another kiss to Vic's cheek, this one closer to the lips. "Maybe a partner." He kissed Vic tentatively, as if asking permission. 

Victor gave it by parting his lips and returning the caress with gradually increasing passion until he had Mac's head pressed into the back of the sofa and their arms wrapped around each other. He thrust his tongue into wet warmth and was met with an enthusiastically hungry response. After a minute or two, he pulled back to catch his breath and stared into Mac's eyes in surprise. 

"You're not just teasing so you can humiliate me later, are you? You want me? I mean, _me_?" Victor was afraid that maybe the medication was affecting Mac's awareness of just what was happening here between them. He tried and failed to ignore his own arousal as he contemplated the man in his arms. This was a dream come true—a good dream instead of the nightmare that had provided the catalyst for this evening. 

Mac nodded and said quietly, "Yeah, you. Victor Mansfield. I've wanted you for awhile, and now you're here, and you say you're in love with me." 

Victor blinked as much at the string of words as at the hand stroking up his thigh. He caught it before it reached its destination and brought it to his mouth. He pressed a kiss to the knuckles, cradled it against his chest, and smiled. "Gosh, Mac what am I going to do with you?" 

"I don't know, fuck me 'til I pass out?" Victor's eyebrows lowered a bit, so Mac said quickly, "How about we go to my bed and make love? But we better do it before the pain pills wear off, because my shoulder's going to hurt like a son-of-a-bitch after all the strain I plan to put on it." 

"Maybe you shouldn't try anything too athletic for awhile," Victor said with a dimple-revealing smile, as he stood and helped Mac to his feet. He punctuated his words with kisses as they walked into the bedroom. "Let me do all the work tonight. Let me take care of you." 

"Sounds good," sighed Mac as they stopped beside the bed, where Victor shucked his jacket and put his gun on the bedside table. Victor kissed his soon-to-be lover deeply, then gently pushed him to the bed, and finished undressing. 

He was about to remove his boxers when a thought occurred to him. He stopped, looked at Mac, and asked quietly, "Cameras? Mikes?" 

Mac grinned and said, "Already disabled. Now strip." 

Victor smiled back and instead stripped Mac's pajamas off in one smooth move. Then he stood there for a moment and stared at the feast of flesh lying before him. With his long rangy body and hairy chest, Mac was beautiful and masculine at the same time. Victor couldn't wait to have those strong legs wrapped around him and that long cock in his hand or mouth or wherever it ended up. 

He ripped off his boxers and climbed on the bed. He straddled Mac's thighs, dipping his face into the long throat as his hands stroked random patterns over everything he could reach. He licked and nibbled his way down to Mac's chest, where he rooted through the hair to find the excited little nipples. He bit and tugged with his teeth until Mac was bucking under him, bringing their cocks into excruciating contact. 

Rocking their hips together, Victor kissed Mac again. Thrilled to finally answer all his questions about the mouth that had haunted him. Plush lips parting easily, Mac let him delve in and explore, teeth and tongue working to full advantage. When Mac took brief control, he was a skillfully attentive kisser. Victor drowned in the generosity of his lover's mouth for breathless moments before moving on. 

He licked the length of Mac's throat, swirling his tongue over the bobbing Adam's apple. He bit down hard at the juncture of neck and shoulder and sucked purposefully, drawing a loud groan and gasp of "More!" He moved a few inches and did it again, sucking hard then licking lightly. He was happy that no matter what happened tomorrow, Mac would not be able to deny this moment. Vic tenderly laved the red marks once more and continued his journey of discovery. 

Victor reveled in Mac's responses as he made his way down the flat stomach, dipping in to tease the belly button then moving on to his final destination. Mac's cock rose up long and lean just like the rest of him, and Victor eagerly stroked it with his hand and dropped his mouth to it. He licked at the head, circling, gauging Mac's sensitivities before taking more of the length. He took as much as he could without gagging, then began to suck, gently at first, then harder as Mac responded with unabashed enthusiasm, moaning and begging wordlessly. 

When he felt Mac get close to the edge, Vic pulled him back by removing his mouth and holding Mac's cock firmly in his hand for a moment. Stroking his closed lips back and forth over the delicate skin of Mac's balls, Victor kept his hands busy stroking his lover's cock, his belly, a hip, a nipple... He licked his way up the inside of Mac's thigh and nuzzled the spot on the perineum that always gave Vic himself a thrill. If Mac's shout was any indication, it gave him quite a kick, too. His mouth replaced his hand on Mac's cock just as the younger man came explosively. Victor swallowed and sucked up every drop, getting accustomed to the unique taste of his new lover. 

He gently released the softening member and kissed his way up to Mac's mouth. Pouring out his feelings, he kissed Mac deeply. For a long moment, their tongues tangled and plunged, sharing the flavors of passion. With one last nibble on those luscious lips, Vic drew back and licked his partner's face from chin to cheekbone, then back down to his lips. He drove one hand into Mac's soft short hair as he thrust his aching, dripping cock into the hollow of Mac's pelvis. He rubbed his rough cheek against his lover's as he pumped his hips, bringing himself to a bone melting release. 

Victor collapsed against Mac's uninjured side and moaned a little. He was suddenly exhausted, but he also felt like all the missing pieces of himself were back in place for the first time in a long while. He knew the words 'you complete me' would make Mac laugh his ass off, so he kept that thought to himself. 

He raised his head, taking in the blissful expression on Mac's face, and he had to kiss him again. Mac's eyes opened languidly, and Victor was caught by the unexpected softness in the gaze that was usually either guarded or sardonic. With a growing sense of wonder, he whispered, "I can't get enough of you." 

Mac smiled gently and said, "I love you, too." 

As Victor blinked in response, Mac murmured, "Sleep, Vic. We'll both be here in the morning." 

The rightness of the simple statement soothed Vic more than anything else ever could, and he knew the nightmares were gone. It was finally safe to sleep again. In Mac's arms. 

* * *

Rating: NC-17   
Spoilers: Pilot, Trial Marriage, Art of Death, Mac Daddy, Last Temptation of Vic—maybe more   
Disclaimer: Characters owned by Alliance or somebody. Borrowed for fun not profit.   
Beta Notes: Thanks to mab and Viridian5 for helping me wrestle those commas & pronouns into submission. Thanks to Nicole for helping me see the Boys and saying I did OK when I was really unsure. Some later changes were made so mistakes are all mine.   
RSM Notes: Thanks to Diana for confidence-boosting early feedback. Sekrit message to Penny: They finally talked! How're Bodie and Doyle doing?   
---


End file.
